The Friction, Differences and Karma Meters: remember how perfect things seemed back in the beginning?
Or maybe you can't even recall those glorious early days, when the future looked rosy and the possibilities for your relationship seemed limitless.
What was it that broke the two of you up, anyway?
The answer to that question is complex and multilayered, to be sure.
Had you known what your relationship trouble spots were, then you could have been better prepared to take one of three routes; avoid them as best as you could, worked through them as a team, or decided it just wasn’t worth the trouble and move on.
Your Friction, Differences and Karma meters give you a quick, at-a-glance view of the strife in your previous relationship -- all the sources of irritation, stress and hostility that ultimately led to that final goodbye.
This information can help you come to terms with your breakup, but also make you aware of pitfalls you may encounter in the future.
7-10: Ouch -- you might still be bitter
4-6: You both knew which buttons to push
0-3: The Problem? A lack of passion.
7-10: You never got each other from day one.
4-6: Your differences were eye-opening... until they got annoying!
0-3: You could still be friends
7-10: It was doomed from the start.
4-6: Unconsciously, you both acted out old issues.
0-3: At least you made new mistakes instead of repeating old ones.
You can be a real pain in the butt, and we couldn't blame your sweetie for booting you right out the door. You pushed your luck too far. The fact of the matter was that you chose a lover who didn't harmonize with you naturally. They tended towards the indulgent: fine food, good wine (and plenty of it!), and abundant socializing while your more discerning, intellectual nature cried out for weightier stimulation. You craved a lover who could talk and argue and analyze as well as experience and enjoy. So, feeling stifled in your relationship, you took it out on the one person who loved you more than any other, which just wasn't fair.Had you squashed your desire to lecture and hector, you could have made it past the rough period. Though you refused to see it, you two actually brought out the best in each other -- you were drawn out of your ivory tower, while your lover's self-indulgent tendencies were curbed in your presence, whether you realized it or not. You should have tried to give your lover a break; stopped trying to control, to change them. Ultimately, the love you wanted was already in your hands. Next time, remember to appreciate what you've got when you've got it.
This relationship wasn't easy from the beginning, and frankly, it's a wonder you made it as far as you did. You and your lover lacked common ground. You had different beliefs and attitudes -- you two might have adhered to different political affiliations, or didn't share common views on morals and ethics. In any case, your differences of opinion drove you apart. You started out in a friendly debate, but as both of you yakked and yakked away you ceased to listen to each other. You felt you were constantly being interrupted, as if you couldn't get your words out. You didn't see eye-to-eye, and it seemed like you never would. Perhaps you were a little quick to turn your back on this sweetie. While it's true that things were sometimes strained between you, there was much potential for your future. Though it was hard for you to understand each other, you could have kept working on it. In your heart of hearts, you shared more than you realized. Had you kept on talking and tried to listen, heard the intent behind the words as well as what was being said, you could really have brought out the best in each other. Supportive communication will be an important feature of your next relationship, too.
The two of you had some difficulty making a go of it. You were suspicious of each other. You didn't see eye-to-eye. You, in particular, viewed your mate with a kind of contempt. That slippery, glib sweetie of yours could be a lot of fun, but seemed awfully insubstantial. You couldn't get the kind of security you craved; it felt as if your lover wouldn't commit. Worse, they had an awful tendency to blurt out the wrong thing in the wrong moment, and let loose some uncomfortable, unvarnished truths that lingered in your mind long after the moment had passed.The key to your problems lay in your past, both distant and recent. Problems you faced long ago left their mark. You were closed where you should have been open, secretive and distant where you should have been accepting and warm. Your path was leading nowhere, so why did you hold on so tightly to old, negative patterns? Some work on yourself would have resulted in a sweet thaw between you two. Your lover was waiting for a cue to let loose a torrent of love; all you needed do was open up and let it in.
What secrets lay behind your lover's dreamy, far-off gaze? You had no idea, really, and the mystery drove you mad. It seemed so romantic to be attached to such a compelling, enigmatic sweetie. Someday, you hoped, you'd find out all the secrets. But until then, you filled the information void with your fantasies. And therein lay your problem. You were not involved in something solid and real at all; instead you were locked in on a shifting miasma. It was darned sexy, and lots of fun. But it was like mist, or fog; when you tried to hold on to your lover things slipped through your hand and refused to be captured. Could you ever have gained a more solid footing on this relationship? It's doubtful. You never did, and what you had started to drift away. You couldn't get a fix on what your lover was feeling or where you were going -- but to be honest, at that point you were too busy enjoying the fantasy to try to inject some reality into the setup. You needed to start examining what you were doing with a more critical eye. Remember, the fantasy is often better than the reality.
Pity your poor lover, because you could be awfully hard to live with. You were constantly annoyed with your sweetie, viewing your lover's dreamy, drifting nature as lazy and unmotivated. You demanded changes, effective yesterday. But what you asked for was both unreasonable and unkind. You simply didn't chose a lover who would have been able to keep up with you intellectually and physically. Your lover wasn't the mover and shaker type. Instead, you chose yourself a sweet, well-meaning, lovable person who just happened to be a little spacey and emotional. The shame was that you chose with your eyes open, and then you demanded things be different.Papering over the problems you created would have been a lot easier if you had accepted reality and stopped wishing for something else. Your lover would always be a little out-there -- and that was part of the charm of your pairing, because it gave you permission to slow down a little. So why didn't you? You needed to just relax and allow yourself an idyll. Your lover had much to teach you if you could have stopped blustering and demanding what you thought you wanted. They key was to embrace the calm, the dreaminess. Just let go; there was a sweet release awaiting you.
Yakkity yak yak. That was you and your sweetie, big ol' gasbags full of opinions and thoughts and plans and musings, but very little in the way of real understanding of each other. You started out with the intention of working out your problems -- but before too long, a discussion of something personal turned into an exchange of philosophies, and then likely an argument that continued into the night. On your part, you got annoyed with your lover's grandiose dreams and rather tenuous grasp on reality, while your lover often saw you as nitpicky and harsh, the emotional equivalent of a big bucket of water poured on their parade.Though it may have seemed that you were swimming in circles, you were actually on a fairly direct path to settled bliss. You and your lover brought out some very interesting qualities in each other. You egged each other on, revved each other up. Though you could get PO'd with each other, all the friction was just as likely to turn you on. And face it -- to you the only fate worse than a tumultuous relationship was a boring one.
They say that misery loves company, but in your case it was the company you were keeping that made you miserable. Who gave you the idea that you were small, weak, meek, easy to overlook? Someone in your past gave you quite a working-over, and you still bear the psychic bruises. That's why you handed your lover the leash and gave up control. You let your lover make all the decisions. You spent all your energy going places your sweetie wanted to go, ignoring your own desires. But those stifled impulses popped up anyway, in the sullen resentment that you showed to your lover. It was so unattractive! But you were stuck in a cycle and couldn't seem to break free.The key to altering your troublesome situation lay in looking inside yourself. What is it you really want from your life? What did you want from your relationship, from your lover? You needed to define your vague longings and give them a voice. Your lover was willing to listen, but couldn't guess what you needed unless you were clear. That clarity would have translated into more respect for you, and better feelings all around. Here's a lesson with broader implications in your life; Clearly say what you want and need, and you're very likely to get it.
Oh, you poor thing. You tried so hard, didn't you? You strived to improve yourself, tune up your relationship, make yourself clear. You were convinced that if your lover would only understand your point of view, if you could find the right words, that all the awkwardness between you would disappear. Sorry, but it was not going to be that easy. Think of it like this: You were a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. You and your mate had much in common: verve, drive, a zest for life. But there were many other things you disagreed on. You, in particular, exhibited signs of arrogance, jealousy, insecurity; all things you knew made you less attractive to your dazzling catch of a mate. There were others who wanted to take your place and you knew it. But you couldn't seem to stop trying to explain yourself once and for all and clear things up between you. Nothing you said did the trick, though. The key was in your behavior instead of your speech. Were you delightful to come home to, loving, interested in what your mate said and did? No? If not, nothing you could say would have taken the place of that lack and maybe you are better off apart.
Other people envied you and your lover, because the two of you were equally lively and bright and seemed so well-matched. You were a sparkling power couple, both blessed with magnetism and drive. But those jealous of your pairing weren't on the inside and thus didn't see the problems. In truth, you and your sweetie had trouble finding common ground. Though you stimulated each other mentally, sometimes all the stimulation turned into irritation. You found it difficult to relax with each other, to go easily into that good night. You may have had a lot of friction, or just a lot of awkward silences. The key lay in de-emphasizing your differences and playing up what you shared in common. You both had an interest in politics, current events, debating controversial issues. You should have tried to focus on these types of topics when you were with your sweetie, rather than devolving into discussions into what was wrong with your relationship, conversations which had a way of turning sour fast. Oddly enough, if you had ignored your problems in favor of just enjoying one another's company, your problems would have dwindled, and eventually disappeared. Strange, but true.
Your love wasn't always pretty. What was once a delicious attachment collapsed in on itself. What happened? One of you forgot the old maxim about the need to let the things you love roam free. Insecurity led to jealousy, jealousy into attempts to control each other. Intense arguments flared, marked by middle-of-the-night discussions, slammed doors, raised voices. In the beginning you had fun together. But that all became a distant memory. But all did not have to be lost if you didn't want it to be. What was needed was a little balance and flexibility. You didn't choose a lover you could wrap up in a tidy little box. No, your lover was passionate and powerful; someone you could admire but not someone who was easy to live with. So you couldn't expect every aspect of your lives together to go just exactly as you'd have liked all the time. Your lover surprised you, and though that could be disconcerting, with the right mindset it could have been exhilarating. You were never bored, and that counted for a lot. You should have enjoyed your intense connection, because without it your life seems a lot more gray.
You're the kind of person who drives through life looking in the rearview mirror. Yeah, your past wasn't ideal. People haven't always treated you as kindly as they could have, and your parents were anything but supportive. But why do you marinate in your misery? That victim label doesn't flatter you, you know. You're such a vital, vibrant soul; don't let your sunshine be dimmed by your rage -- and yes, rage is what it is, masquerading as hurt. Now, speaking of dim, it is true you chose a rather stodgy lover; serious where you were lighthearted, weighty and solid where you were impetuous and moving in too many directions. Your lover pulled out your best qualities simply by acting as a reality check. Yet your disparities troubled you. You didn't feel as connected, or as comfortable as you could have. The two of you couldn't seem to relax together into something sweet and easy. But if you could have found a way to unload some of your emotional baggage, to become more comfortable in your own skin, you would have found more ease in your pairing. Work on these sticky issues before you throw your hat into the arena of love next time.
Why, oh, why did you and your lover keep finding yourselves in a bad place? You seemed stuck on a terrible treadmill. The pair of you pulled apart, came together, drifted away, circled back. You tired of repeating the same patterns. The chief problem you had with your sweetie was that you couldn't seem to find common ground. And it's true, you didn't have a lot in common -- you were driven while your lover was dreamy, you wanted to stride through the world making big changes, while your lover was more apt to dawdle and drift.But why should you have expected any different when you were the architect of this awkwardness? You were attracted to your lover because of your differences, not in spite of them. Your lover wanted you to slow down a little, to appreciate the subtle and magical rather than just the here and now. In your arrogance you wanted to force your sweetie to see things from your perspective, but that was shortsighted. You needed to bend a little and listen to someone else for a change. You may have found you had a lot to learn about life, not to mention your lover.
There's glue, and then there's glue. Elmer's versus epoxy, Velcro versus nails. Your relationship was bound by the easy-to-separate type of togetherness, not the wild-horses-couldn't-drag-us-apart variety. Now, don't misunderstand: This is not to say that there was not a strong connection between you. But you were able to take the occasional separate vacation; to enjoy your own interests without your partner feeling threatened; to be two distinct individuals who chose to hang out together. Compare this to the joined-at-the-hip, can't-bear-to-be-apart couple. Didn't you always wonder about them? What did they think would happen if they weren't together for an entire evening, much less a day or even a week?Separation was not a problem for you two; in fact, you may have done it by choice on a regular basis. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder, and this was surely true of you and your partner. You took great joy in sharing your individual experiences, as well as in spending time together. If anything, you might have had to make it a point to schedule in time to be together! You may each have been involved in your own orbits that you suddenly realized that days or even weeks had gone by without you two sharing a full day together.You shouldn't have let that happen. You needed to discover the challenges of your relationship, which so often can turn out to be opportunities for growth and development. You two had chosen to be together, and likewise, you could have chosen to grow together.
I hope you have enjoyed the valuable insight, wisdom and guidance of this astrology report. You might be a little curious about astrology and perhaps wondering how an astrologer can know so much about you!
Astrology is a mathematical system. It's all about applying meaning to numbers, or more specifically, finding meaning in the movements of the planets around the Sun, as viewed from our perspective here on earth. These planetary movements are easily captured and recorded with measurements, calculations, angles and so on.
That's why astrology works so well with computers, whose programs are also based on numbers and formulas. In 'the old days' -- thousands of years ago, when astrology was first recorded -- those early astrologers had to painstakingly observe the heavens and catalog their observations for the next generation of astrologers to build upon. Thank goodness for the computer age! Now we can simply use computers to make those calculations quickly and pull just the applicable pieces of information. Now, astrology is instant, based upon thousands of years of observations obtained through careful methodology.
Interpretations of planetary positions are based in part on ancient Greek and Roman mythology, but your astrological report is unique, describing you and you only. Even in the case of twin siblings, their birth charts differ from each other's in at least a few ways. And besides, no one amounts to just a simple interpretation of their birth chart; everyone's personality is complex. Your astrological report leaves plenty of room for variations based on your free will, personal growth and transformation over a lifetime.
Just like you, your astrological report is unique. It’s generated online in seconds and provides you with instant insight at your fingertips. Whether you have a pressing question about your future or you just want some guidance and direction, now you can have it all -- in a fast, focused, all-about-you format.
You can choose from several different types to find the report that's right for you and your needs. Your natal report is all about you -- your unique characteristics, strengths, weaknesses, potential and so on. Compatibility reports analyze the connections between two different people, to see how well and in what ways they get along. And a forecast is based on where the planets are today and how they're affecting you, uniquely. Be sure to try a free sample of another report to find out more about you!
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