The Friction, Differences and Karma Meters: remember how perfect things seemed back in the beginning?
Or maybe you can't even recall those glorious early days, when the future looked rosy and the possibilities for your relationship seemed limitless.
What was it that broke the two of you up, anyway?
The answer to that question is complex and multilayered, to be sure.
Had you known what your relationship trouble spots were, then you could have been better prepared to take one of three routes; avoid them as best as you could, worked through them as a team, or decided it just wasn’t worth the trouble and move on.
Your Friction, Differences and Karma meters give you a quick, at-a-glance view of the strife in your previous relationship -- all the sources of irritation, stress and hostility that ultimately led to that final goodbye.
This information can help you come to terms with your breakup, but also make you aware of pitfalls you may encounter in the future.
7-10: Ouch -- you might still be bitter
4-6: You both knew which buttons to push
0-3: The Problem? A lack of passion.
7-10: You never got each other from day one.
4-6: Your differences were eye-opening... until they got annoying!
0-3: You could still be friends
7-10: It was doomed from the start.
4-6: Unconsciously, you both acted out old issues.
0-3: At least you made new mistakes instead of repeating old ones.
Of course your relationship had issues! This meeting of two such powerful personalities was bound to strike sparks. Your lover likely excited you like no other. This force of nature tended to be impulsive and fearless, lusty and straightforward, with a confidence that rivaled your own. Together and apart, you strode through your lives with a daring that others could only wonder at. When you were united you lived a life writ large -- but unfortunately, your conflicts rivaled your passion. Titanic arguments, friction, a link that always seemed to be teetering on self-destruction -- you never heard love was easy, but did it have to be that hard? Both of you needed to give a little if things were going to work out between you. Instead, you struggled together over everything, wasting your prodigious energies on treading water rather than moving forward. And since you were the more gentle-natured, it was you who had to accept what you couldn't change. It might have worked out if you'd stopped hounding your lover over issues that were mere annoyances instead of true deal-breakers. If you could have managed to quell your troublesome quibbling, you and your lover could have had something really special.
You received a taste of your own medicine, and you didn't like it one bit. You were usually the one who had the upper hand in relationships, sitting in judgment against a partner who you felt didn't measure up to your high standards. But your passionate sweetie had you in an uproar. Compelling, magnetic, but awfully hard to tame, your lover alternated between periods of aggressive interest, followed by boredom. And you were stuck between the two poles, infuriated but interested. You felt as though you couldn't get your footing, as though you were at a loss.Does it help to know that your mate didn't mean to blow hot and cold? Your sweetie often hurt the ones they loved, though it wasn't intentional. The key to maintaining your sanity would have been self-confidence; mustering that hardworking practical strength and hunkering down to work on your own projects. Your dear would have come hither once it was clear that you were not going to beg and scrape for crumbs of affection. The commitment you were craving was not out of the question; but it would have required that you bring some calm to your tempestuous pas de deux.
Hmm, now this was an odd pairing. An assertive force linked with the watery dreamer. Opposites attracted, huh? It was likely you were befuddled and bewitched by your lover's mysteries. You couldn't see clearly where the two of you were, and it tweaked both your ego and your intellect. That was all fine and good, but there was a dark side to your pairing. One or both of you was repeating unhealthy patterns, bringing leftovers from the past into your relationship. There may have been issues around addictions -- to drugs, to alcohol, to unwholesome behavior of many kinds. And worst of all, your relationship was insubstantial, misty, a thing composed of passionate nights that crumbled to dust under day-to-day stresses.To make this work, you needed to let some sunlight into your relationship. Stop subsisting on passion alone, and start actually getting to know the lover you chose. Talked about your dreams, make plans. Make sure you were both moving in the same direction. This relationship could have brought good in you, but you had to be willing to put in some work instead of just drifting along like two balloons buffeted by every wind. Next time, you might prefer a more grounded pairing.
Your love relationship wasn't always a very comfortable place to be, was it? Fits and sulks, arguments and deadly silences with much left unsaid in the spaces between verbal assaults. You laid the fault for this open warfare at your lover's feet, but think about it: Were you really the kind of mate you'd have liked to come home to? Were you sweet and loving or bossy and demanding? Did you long to hold your lover close, or bash a frying pan over their head? The going was rough that you finally gave up. Yet how happy are you, really, without this relationship that caused you such strife? There could have been much to gain if you were willing to do a little more work. And the first thing on your to-do list should have been an honest look at yourself. Were you dragging baggage from your past into the problems of this relationship? Were you tweaking your lover's insecurities because of your own? Try analyzing this relationship in terms of your past, particularly if, during the relationship, you had the feeling that you'd been there before. You're going to have to work out your psychological hang-ups now, or you risk repeating the same pattern again and again.
Misunderstandings cropped up frequently between you and your lover, didn't they? It seemed as if you always ended up bewildered, apologizing for something when you didn't always know what you did. Meanwhile, your lover pouted and sulked, wrapped in suspicion. Much of the problem lay in the fact that you didn't communicate well. You were distanced from your emotions, wishing to bury yourself in work and your goals instead. And your lover imagined the worst of you, made up scenarios and then treated you as if you'd erred somehow, or as if you'd made promises that you didn't keep.If you had wanted this relationship to survive, the two of you were simply going to have to learn to see eye to eye, and you weren't going to be able to do it by ignoring your problems. You had to gather your courage and start talking. Reveal your feelings. It would have been uncomfortable for you, but you needed to begin, since your partner tended to invent information to fill the gaps you left. Though you didn't know it, your partner's feelings and desires were much the same as yours and a comfortable familiarity would have filled your lives if you'd broken through your block. Warmth would have been a lot more fun than ice.
You saw the bad moon rising, and it was not your imagination. One of you had hot pants and a wandering eye, and vows may have been broken. Was there a not-so-ex ex in the picture? If so, it could have proven to be a distraction. The tempted-to-stray partner was distracted, distant; the other felt sad, desperate, terribly insecure. At times the suspicion got so bad that spying was indulged in. Pawing through a lover's pockets was tacky, but that was the least of it. This relationship may never have gotten secure and content. There was an undercurrent of friction and too much awareness of other options besides sticking in this relationship. Nonetheless, there was a lot to recommend staying together. You shared a lusty physical connection, similar senses of humor, a love of play and fun. All of that could have gone a long way, if the jealousy of one partner didn't sour all the good times. If you were the green-eyed one, here's a piece of advice for the future: Nothing makes you less sexy than demanding and pouting and blustering; something to keep in mind for next time. If you'd tried playing it a little cooler your lover might have just come hither.
Friends didn't seem so friendly for the pair of you -- it's likely you had a lot of friction around the issue of pals. You would have liked to spend evenings at home or spend your spare time in pursuits that broadened the mind; your lover, on the other hand, just seemed to want to hang out. All the time. With just about anyone. With people, in fact, who's friendship you would have preferred not to spend one iota of free time cultivating. Both of you wished the other would bend, and what's worse is that neither of you seemed to communicate your feelings about such matters in a way the other understood. What you needed to make this work was more alone time together, and your sweet companion was more than willing to schedule special dates for you. You could have taken up an activity together that you'd both have enjoyed -- perhaps something like a dance class, or a course in sensual massage for couples, anything that would have gotten you to slow down long enough to enjoy yourself as well as book a slot in your lover's busy schedule. More harmony more of the time would have helped you both to sing in tune.
It's no use fitting a square peg into a round hole, they say, but that didn't stop you from trying to nitpick your lover into submission. You were the picture of aggression and energy. That's usually a good thing, but in this case your drive went awry. Your irresistible force came up against an immovable object: your stern, sexy, stubborn love. You were convinced you could change your sweetie into just the person you wanted to be with, but couldn't you see that all your demands were getting you nowhere? Rather than comply with your directives, your lover pulled away. You viewed this retreat as a challenge, and pushed harder. And thus a cycle was set up, where the more you chased the further away your lover ran.You could have cooled your jets a little. Backed off. Given your lover a break. Your way was not THE way, and you didn't know it all. Maybe if, in the future, you spend a bit more time trying to understand the way your lover does things, rather than demanding everything be your way, you can channel some of your extra energy into fun and passion rather than draining it all away with anger.
You stumbled into the family den of relationships: What you had was solid, dependable, salt-of-the-earth -- and not a whole lot of fun. The problem lay in your mismatch of aims. Though you were ambitious in your own way, driven to travel, study, communicate with others, you didn't have the same 9-to-5 mentality that your sweetie did. You bagged yourself a hard worker, and while that's great for stuff like paying the bills, it didn't leave a whole lot of room to throw everything up in the air and trot off to Paris for the weekend. You craved more excitement. You wanted more fun, more spontaneity. You complained to your friends that your lover was so sweet, but such a drag.But there were sides to the situation you weren't considering. What you had was stable and real, something that could have been lasting. You had the type of relationship that could have been a wonderful foundation to build a family upon. Whoever said one person should meet all of your needs? You could have kept your fun friends and your serious sweetie; there are many facets to you, and your lover helped you polish one of the most important. Take your newly faceted self and head back out into the dating field. You've got plenty to offer.
The tension between you and your lover could be thick enough to cut with a knife, painful enough to make you want to scream. The problems you experienced could be laid handily at the doors of your very different natures. You wanted structure and stability -- you wanted to know where your relationship was going, you wanted to know you could count on a date for the movies and quiet dinners at home. But the mate you chose was anything but the stay-by-the-fire type. Instead, your sweetie wanted to socialize eight days a week. You lacked substantive time alone enjoying your pairing, and were either dragged along to events you'd rather not have patronized or left at home, wondering what was going on when you were not around to supervise. You had very different needs. But if you had really wanted this relationship to survive, the answer was to let go a little. What's that old saying about if you love something, set it free? Love is not a puppy you can squeeze or a document you can pore over. Instead it is unpredictable and fierce, by turns sweet and biting. You need to savor both sides of your love relationship. Don't ask for more than your lover can give, and ironically, you'll find that you got a lot more. Good advice for next time!
There's glue, and then there's glue. Elmer's versus epoxy, Velcro versus nails. Your relationship was bound by the easy-to-separate type of togetherness, not the wild-horses-couldn't-drag-us-apart variety. Now, don't misunderstand: This is not to say that there was not a strong connection between you. But you were able to take the occasional separate vacation; to enjoy your own interests without your partner feeling threatened; to be two distinct individuals who chose to hang out together. Compare this to the joined-at-the-hip, can't-bear-to-be-apart couple. Didn't you always wonder about them? What did they think would happen if they weren't together for an entire evening, much less a day or even a week?Separation was not a problem for you two; in fact, you may have done it by choice on a regular basis. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder, and this was surely true of you and your partner. You took great joy in sharing your individual experiences, as well as in spending time together. If anything, you might have had to make it a point to schedule in time to be together! You may each have been involved in your own orbits that you suddenly realized that days or even weeks had gone by without you two sharing a full day together.You shouldn't have let that happen. You needed to discover the challenges of your relationship, which so often can turn out to be opportunities for growth and development. You two had chosen to be together, and likewise, you could have chosen to grow together.
I hope you have enjoyed the valuable insight, wisdom and guidance of this astrology report. You might be a little curious about astrology and perhaps wondering how an astrologer can know so much about you!
Astrology is a mathematical system. It's all about applying meaning to numbers, or more specifically, finding meaning in the movements of the planets around the Sun, as viewed from our perspective here on earth. These planetary movements are easily captured and recorded with measurements, calculations, angles and so on.
That's why astrology works so well with computers, whose programs are also based on numbers and formulas. In 'the old days' -- thousands of years ago, when astrology was first recorded -- those early astrologers had to painstakingly observe the heavens and catalog their observations for the next generation of astrologers to build upon. Thank goodness for the computer age! Now we can simply use computers to make those calculations quickly and pull just the applicable pieces of information. Now, astrology is instant, based upon thousands of years of observations obtained through careful methodology.
Interpretations of planetary positions are based in part on ancient Greek and Roman mythology, but your astrological report is unique, describing you and you only. Even in the case of twin siblings, their birth charts differ from each other's in at least a few ways. And besides, no one amounts to just a simple interpretation of their birth chart; everyone's personality is complex. Your astrological report leaves plenty of room for variations based on your free will, personal growth and transformation over a lifetime.
Just like you, your astrological report is unique. It’s generated online in seconds and provides you with instant insight at your fingertips. Whether you have a pressing question about your future or you just want some guidance and direction, now you can have it all -- in a fast, focused, all-about-you format.
You can choose from several different types to find the report that's right for you and your needs. Your natal report is all about you -- your unique characteristics, strengths, weaknesses, potential and so on. Compatibility reports analyze the connections between two different people, to see how well and in what ways they get along. And a forecast is based on where the planets are today and how they're affecting you, uniquely. Be sure to try a free sample of another report to find out more about you!
I’m so glad to be a part of your journey to self-discovery and alignment with your planetary destiny. Please let me know if you have any questions about this product or your next steps.
P.S. Are you hooked and excited to learn more? Follow the links below for (free!) real-time astrology updates, daily horoscopes, personalized information, and more- all from Kelli Fox!